Lacey s Story

Charleston, SC USA

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"I’ve wasted so much time hating myself. From the outside, I look like a young woman with lots of accomplishments, friends, and a loving family. It probably looks like I have everything going for me. But, the reality is that I have struggled to love myself ever since I was a little girl.

 

I’ve been on anti-depression and anti-anxiety medication since I was in middle school. I constantly put myself down and ask 'Am I enough?' in almost every aspect of my life. The negative voice inside my head has become my biggest enemy. It is the most hateful voice I have ever heard.

 

As a dancer, I’ve battled with body insecurities for a long time. When you’re dancing in front of a mirror everyday in a tight leotard, it is hard not to compare yourself to the thin ballerina next to you. Dance is an extremely vulnerable art. It focuses on your physical ability and your appearance. Dance is my whole life, an indispensable part of my being, and the thought of failing or not being 'good enough' is terrifying. But, I continue to dance and move forward with a constant war of self-doubt that haunts my brain because dance is my passion and my reason for being.

 

With age and meditation practice, my negative thoughts and insecurities have subsided. A big part of my healing has been realizing that everyone has struggles. I used to think that I was crazy, that I was the only one having a hard time loving myself. But, so many people have similar issues. They just choose to struggle in silence. Our society has taught us that talking about our issues shows weakness. I believe that by being open and vulnerable we can exercise empathy and support others with invisible illnesses."

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